Have you ever felt someone elses energy rub off on you? I had just such a day today. Usually it is positive but today this person was having a bit of a rough time, and well I decided (subconsciously) to meld my energy with theirs and I too started having a rough day. I had zero tollerance and I was not in the mood for anything. Then I was asked to help out with work "later" (which ended up being near 9ish pm) and honestly I was just not having it. I did it, but definitely with a chip on my shoulder. I was not friendly in the least. I didn't start off that way but like I said the pervious energy rubbed off on me and it was down hill from there. It is amazing how those around me affect me for positive or for negative. And how often I don't even recognize the change.
I am really struggling right now. I am trying to stay positive but for what ever reason I am not in a glass half full kind of mind set. I try and focus on the little things, and I try and be happy for what little progress I can "see" but I find that all my minds eye sees is more of negative and no change. I have to cut myself some slack I know that and that is logical but I can't seem to shake the negative thoughts in my head. A day or two ago my life coach and I went shopping at the outlets. I thought I would be brave and try some things on. Standing there looking at myself all I could think was you have done all this work for what? You still look just as bad in clothes as you did before. The same rolls are still visible on your arms and your stomach nothing has dissappeared or gotten smaller. The only change that I can see is that I eat less. But in all honesty I have found ways to "cheat" without cheating. I need a swift kick in the butt. I need to get out of this funk. I need to keep looking forward and at all costs avoid shopping, mirrors, and skinny girls. (Ok just kidding, I can't avoid skinny girls I like my skinny girl friends).
I have decided to add a couple of quotes to motivate me....
"Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.”
Mark Victor Hansen
"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
Winston Churchill
People underestimate their capacity for change. There is never a right time to do a difficult thing.
John Porter
And one last one from me.
A tree starts out as small seed. With water, sunlight, nutrients and good soil it will someday grow to be something magnificant. I am like a seed. I started out small, weak, and in need of help. With support, love, understanding of self, acceptance, and hard work I will become the me I always should have been; beautiful, and strong.
Angela Walters
Love Angela
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