First day of week 10. I almosts went off the deep end today. Grrrrr I was so frustrated I just wanted to eat to calm me down. I substitute teach and most of the time it is a breeze but today the kids really tried my patience. (yep there is that word again it keeps creeping up.) I had 6th grade...they are such little angels I just want to hug and squeeze each one of them, I just don't know how this world would ever survive without 6th graders......BLAH that is a bunch of crap! Sometimes I just want to stick magnets on their backs and duct tape on their mouths. The magnets for entertainment, kind of like bumper cars they will be pulled in different directions and always slamming into each other. Duct tape so I don't have to hear a single word out of their mouths. They talk sooooo much non stop about nothing. I didn't know there was enough nothing to talk about but apparently there is. Heaven forbid you get to teach them something. What, isn't school about socializing? My bad, I totally thought it was for learning! Shut up, what was I thinking!
Since I didn't stop on the way home from school to get something I shouldn't have I decided it was ok for me to have extra protein at dinner. I just couldn't stop myself I had to keep going back and cutting little bite size pieces off of the steak that we had. I even thought about going and getting more bites while I was sitting watching a movie. It wasn't that it tasted amazing and i just had to have more. It was more the fact that my brain said eat and my body said ok. It is that whole auto pilot thing. It is very hard to over-ride auto pilot. It is almost as if you are in a trance and you know you should stop but you just can't make yourself. Hopefully someday I will be able to figure out a way or to identify what brain button I need to engage so that i can deactivate the auto-pilot mode on my brain. Until then, I just have to learn to fly in circles and keep away from the kitchen.
Love Angela
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