What can I say besides 2011 was a year of change and a year of learning more about who I am. I have been humbled by so many of you out there in my little world and all the overwhelming support to see me succeed even when I didn't think I could do it. It is a day to day struggle (since I am trying to undo 30 years of old habits that seriously DIE HARD! ). I have come a long way and I don't give myself enough credit for that. So I want to say, "ANGELA you are AWESOME and you have made GREAT strides in your PROGRESS towards a healthier life."
That being said I have will admit that over the holiday break I sort of let things go more than I should have. Not sort of, I DID let things go. I wanted to give myself some room to expand my waist line...how did it feel do you ask? CRAPPY. I didn't have the sugar or carbs etc I stayed faithful to that but I did allow myself to over eat. I cannot tell you how much I realize that, that is not what I want in my life. I may not always like to be limited on what I am consuming or that I still stare longingly at those that can consume carbs that are instantly burned and never reach their thighs. I still dream about food, making it, eating it, rolling in it, etc. but at the same time I know that I am stronger than the food, or at least I am gaining more strength then I give the food. Instead of food having the larger percentage for example 99.9% I now feel that food only has a 60% hold on me and I have a 40 % hold on it.
I am raring to go with what 2012 has to offer me. There are so many great and hard things coming my way this year and I want to enjoy every moment. I want to walk across the stage at my graduation in May and be proud of the person that I have become. I want to look at a pizza and be satisfied with one slice. I want to walk 2 miles without the idea feeling insurmountable. I know that all of these things are possible and mark my words they will all be accomplished. I know I can do it.
I never realized how far my story/journey has traveled and effected others' lives. I started blogging and being completely honest with myself and with you because I wanted others to know that a real person who struggles often can be successful and if I can do it...I can gaurantee that you can as well. I didn't just want to change myself but I wanted to inspire others to see that change is possible for them as well. There are so many things that I keep/kept locked in my little head that I just never thought anyone in the world ever felt the same way; people please, I was so wrong. there are so many of you that have shared your stories with me and have made me realize that I am not alone; and that I have NEVER been alone.
I still have some progress to make but I am well on my way! Yes I have hit the 100lb mark (we won't mention the 5 lbs I gained over the holiday....that will come off right away). That is a huge milestone in my life. I have several goals this year. I want to graduate, move across country, be on the Ellen show (for my weight loss story) and be on the cover of People magazines 1/2 their size issue for 2013! (If any of you know anyone that works for Ellen, or for People and can pull some strings for me that would be great! lol).
Lastly, I want you to know that this past year I went to Disneyland and I was able to ride every ride with no issues, thanks to a smaller waistline as well as flying home without using an extender for my seat belt. I will have you know that a couple of years back I "borrowed" an extender so that I didn't have to continually ask for one whenever I flew; this December I "returned" said "borrowed" extender because this girl doesn't need it ANYMORE!
Here is to an amazing year for you and for me! I wish all of you success in all that you choose to do this year. I also want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for your continual thoughts, prayers, and encouragement that you unconditionally give me! You are the best, always and forever!
Once a closed rosebud hidden from the world scared; now awakened, head held high, blossoming for all the world to see the beauty that was inside.