I have been out of the house ALLLLL day. Granted I was just at someone else's house but still, it is progress. I started off with an early morning movie...which shall remain nameless (I was disappointed and wish not to discuss it lol). Have you ever noticed how noisy popcorn is? Here I am trying to enjoy the previews and all I hear is crunching and rustling in bags and the little pop kernels make when you bite into them. It seems my food senses have been heightened since I have chosen to stop eating the crap. Everything smells more tempting, or sounds like it will taste yummier, and even looks more divine! That is just not cool. It is like a vampire that smells blood...the eyes narrow, the nostrils flair, and everything else disappears. (sorry my cousin is reading the twilight books and so it was on my brain, but the reference works regardless!)
Before I left the house I felt good. I had a full water bottle (who knew that would become my new purse accessory) 4 medifast meals (didn't know how long I would be gone and wanted to be prepared) and a sunny disposition. Upon returning home, I had 1 medifast meal left, an empty bottle water (which i had emptied and filled 3 times during the day) and still my sunny disposition. Hmmm maybe this medifast thing won't kill me after all.
While at my friends house we were catching up on some shows that she tivo'd for us to watch. She made herself some lunch. I was waiting for my 2 hour brain timer to ding letting me know it was time for me to eat again. She sits down next to me, with a bowl of spaghetti o's. I DON'T EVEN LIKE SPAGHETTI O'S, but all I wanted to do was push her off the couch and steal the bowl from her before she even knew what happened. It's almost comical how my mind works. (I can laugh about it now) In the moment it takes everything I have to just stay strong, and to overcome. I have doubts about my strength. I have been able to do it so far, but I can't promise that I won't mess up or that I won't fall off the preverbial "wagon". That may happen and do you know what I am going to do when or if it does? I am going to get up brush myself off and move forward. There is no going back or looking back. This is a life of forward motion and progress.
Again I raise my glass, of water, to toast. I toast to moving forward, and progression regardless of the bumps in the road.
Love Angela
Such progress from yesterday. I think being prepared is half the battle. Good thinking to take all that with you so you would be prepared! You sound like you had a very good day! Cheers (I have my water in my hand) ;D
ReplyDeleteI'm soooo sorry if my spaghettio's were a bad choice. I had too eat something. :-( LOL LOVE YA!!!
ReplyDeleteLOL I know exactly what you are talking about in regards to wanting to snatch the spaghetti-O's. Although I doubt I would think on that one, when Bert was eating Mac & Cheese (KRAFT) I was ready to tackle him. This isn't usually my first choice or even any where near my top ten but it looked and smelled delicious. I positioned myself as far away from him as I could. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteCarrie